I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
