I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
