Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize