I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
