Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I CAN MOONWALK!
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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