TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
