I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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