Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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