I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You ate ashes out of my bong
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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