Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
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