you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Randomize
