I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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