I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
