Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
