I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
