Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize