sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
