everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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