idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
