Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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