it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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