Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
