dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
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