You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize