I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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