she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
