Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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