i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
