They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize