Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken

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(386): View more from Florida

According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house

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(203): View more from Connecticut

They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Stupid adulating

(1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash

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(512): View more from Texas

I think I fell in love last night

(210): View more from Texas

That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.

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