her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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