She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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