Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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