honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
