Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
we're chasing vodka with high fives
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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