And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
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