ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
