I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
home. puking in laundry basket.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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