I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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