My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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