Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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