hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
