...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
