This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
