That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize