just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
