I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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