we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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