what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
