He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize